WWE Money in the Bank 2016 Review

Money in the Bank Card

Here comes the money… in the bank.  Yes the WWE’s briefcase centric PPV has concluded, so let’s run down the card match by match


The pre-show was two nothing matches.  Golden Truth beat FaBreeze and The Lucha Dragons jobbed out the Dudley Boyz.  Both matches are barely worth mentioning.  So I won’t.

Coupla Haytah’s

The curtain jerker of the PPV was a Fatal 4-Way match for the tag titles.  The New Day squared off against Enzo & Cass, The Vaudevillains, and The Club.  4-way tag matches are almost always a fun watch but they’re almost always a mess as well.  All four teams are incredibly talented in the ring and the action was steady throughout.  There were few notable botches, but there always is in these massive tag matches.  In the end New Day retained their titles.

This move is awesome and terrifying.
This move is awesome and terrifying.

Fight Forever JK

The second match started a trend that killed the PPV.  The first hour of the PPV was essentially a very long pre show.  The tag match was good, although it was only about 10 minutes long.  Then we got Corbin vs Ziggler.  I like both these guys.  But holy shit, is Corbin not allowed to wrestle anybody else?  Since hitting the main roster at Wrestlemania, Corbin has wrestled Ziggler in over half of his TV matches since, and their feud has stagnated.  Badly.  It seriously should have ended over a month ago.  The match was fine but it was nothing we haven’t seen on TV every week for the last 3 months.  Corbin picked up the clean win.  Good piss break.

I can't think of a good joke about Corbin's gut but you know there's some great ones.
I can’t think of a good joke about Corbin’s gut but you know there’s some great ones.

Token Women Appearance

Next we had a women’s tag match, Charlotte and Dana Brooke vs Natalya and Becky Lynch.  Why isn’t the women’s belt being defended?  Shame on you Charlotte.  This match was absolutely forgettable and unimportant.  Only thing of note was Natalya turning heel on Becky after losing.  Hopefully she doesn’t go back to her farting gimmick.

We want Sasha.
We want Sasha.


Sheamus and Apollo Crews have been feuding in backstage segments for a few weeks now.  It’s weird.  Another uneventful match that didn’t really matter, but Apollo did do a cool moonsault off the apron.  Apollo won which is nice for him but holy geez Sheamus has fallen pretty far from being the freakin world champ in December.

Something Something Dream Match

Now this is where the PPV gets good.  John Cena vs AJ Styles wrestling.  Get in.  Now this was a very good match.  AJ bumped like a boss but also showed very strong offense and effective counters against Cena’s 5 moves of doom.  It is really surreal to see this match actually goddamn happening.  WWE have been pushing it as a dream match 10 years in the making, which is true.  Did it live up to all the hype?  Nope, but I didn’t expect it to.  It’s fair to say that Cena looked pretty rusty after being out of action for months and he seemed to have some trouble keeping up with AJ.  In the end, The Club interfered leading to a win for AJ via shenanigans.  I was hoping AJ would win clean, but it’s better than Super Cena running wild.  Overall a very good match.

Let no one say that Cena isn't a team player.
Let no one say that Cena isn’t a team player.

Upper Midcard in the Bank


Straight off the Cena vs Styles barn burner, we get the titular match.  This year has been a great year for ladder matches in the WWE.  The midcard is so fucking talented right now, and the ladder matches they’ve been putting on are almost always Match of the Night.  Once again, they did not disappoint.  The match was an absolute spot-fest with all the guys beating the Holy Fuck out of each other.  Lots of very hard hitting spots and fast action meant that the match never slowed down and never got boring.  Let us also take a moment of silence to commemorate Kevin Owens, who died for our entertainment on a ladder.  Eventually Dean Ambrose became Mr. Money in the Bank. Yessssssss please.

Cesaro's dance moves are next level.
Cesaro’s dance moves are next level.


In the final piss break before the main event, Rusev returned to his original WWE gimmick of beating up black people.  Rusev beat Titus O’Neil to retain the U.S Championship.  The match was pretty short but just like most of the other matches on the card it just didn’t matter.  Props to Rusev for talking shit to Titus’s kids after beating him.  Good stuff.

Alright This Main Event Was Stupid Good

CrossFit Jesus walks amongst us again! Yes this main event was Roman Reigns defending the WWE Championship again the former champ Seth Rollins.  The build to this match has been really wonky, despite the fact that the story has fallen into WWE’s lap.  Rollins returned from injury last month after destroying his knee in November and being forced to vacate the title.  WWE also aired a 24 about Seth’s road to recovery that painted him as a super babyface.  So despite returning to attack Roman last month and getting a Triple H in 2002 pop, WWE kept him heel.  Well they tried to keep him heel.  Why?  Seth was the company’s hottest babyface the second he broke the curtain at Extreme Rules last month.  Why would you fight that?  In any case, Seth will be the default face to the fans since he’s wrestling the world’s most unpopular man.  The match starts at a very slow pace, but eventually picks up and boy does it pick up.  For all the negative things that get said about Roman, he’s not bad in the ring and can be carried to great matches when he works with very talented guys.  Seth Rollins is a very talented guy.  So yea, they had a great match.  The biggest news to come out of the match was the finish.  After comical levels of ref bumps, Rollins hits 2 Pedigree’s and pins Roman.  Clean.  Fucking clean.  YES!  This was Roman’s first clean loss on the main roster, and his first clean loss since 2012 in FCW.  WWE actually put somebody over him!  Woohoo!  It’s absolutely incredible to see Seth standing over Roman, once again the champ.

Can you see me now JAHN
Can you see me now JAHN

Then it happens.

Dean Fucking Ambrose.

Dean runs out and cashes in his Money in the Bank after only holding it for 56 minutes!  He’s also the first person since Kane to cash it in the same night that he won it.  After giving Rollins a smack with the briefcase, and then hits Dirty Deeds for the win and the belt in 9 seconds.  Dean Ambrose is the champ.  He’s actually the champ.  Oh my good god.  This is the smartest booking decision that WWE have made all year, and best ending to a PPV in a long time.  Well done Ambrose.

Give thanks.
Give thanks.

Should You Care?

I’ll say yes.  This PPV is really only about 3 matches, Cena vs Styles, The Ladder Match, and Rollins vs Reigns but those 3 matches are soooooo good.  Give it a watch just to see Ambrose finally win the belt.  You won’t regret it.  Let us know your thoughts in the comments below.


Justin should probably be in class right now. @JerstinRob

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